Lately

I haven't written for months. I was supposed to be blogging elsewhere, but I even abandoned that, it's just been too much lately. I was supposed to be doing jobs for two friends of friends, but I haven't been able to.

There's just been so much going on this summer with the internship and the funeral in New Hampshire. I really enjoy the internship and the other interns I've been meeting, but right now I'm just horribly confused.

Thursday wasn't supposed to dissolve the summer. I'm so scared I've lost her as a friend, because of whatever she thinks right now. I hope we'll talk again. I sent her a message on Skype, I probably shouldn't have. But I am a paranoid worrier.

Probably didn't help any. I wouldn't be so surprised if it backfired on me. Maybe she'll de-friend me. What if?

Then what will I do?

Song: Trouble by Coldplay

Very appropriate for right now. I didn't mean to cause you any trouble.

And then there are the guys.

I don't really know what to do about that. I've never been in a situation like this and a part of me is convinced there isn't anything going on really, it's just my overactive imagination, but if people have noticed than perhaps something is going on.

They just talk to me quite a bit and I honestly don't know what to make of it. It's different and new, it's not bad, it's just not what I'm used to. Guys haven't really talked to me much. I mean, I don't get much opportunity in school, but even so, when I was in grade school. Absolutely nothing.