Stranger to them, Stranger to me

I am beginning to alienate the world and the world is beginning to alienate me. Namely my family. I never felt like I wanted to be a big sister though I am certain I did at one time or another. That "feeling" has been lost for a long time. I have no time or tolerance to be a big sister to Lion. None at all. She drives me crazy. I don't find her cute. I find her positively annoying or I am indifferent to what she does. I don't know what to say to her, though she always has something to report to me, even if I'm only half listening. It's terrible and my friends who are younger siblings have always chastised, criticized or told me that it's terrible of me.

I know it is. Okay? And I know having personal baggage is no excuse. But couldn't it be?

So enter Mika. She's living at our house now. A fifth addition to the family.

I am grateful for her presence and Lionne is also. Because? Because she acts as the older sister that I cannot be.