I won't forgive me

I've decided after some thinking and eating and sitting and anger just coiled up in me like a unblinking snake, in my house full of death and spiders, that I can admit I am a shit person. And I won't forgive myself for it.

It won't really make anything better, but I suppose in some respects it might. I need to speak to someone and cry. Isn't that what shrinks are for?

I feel like I don't have any friends.