Four of the H-Squad members and I are planning/planned a Senior Summer Trip. We have planned and brainstormed for a while.

This is what I just posted on Facebook in reply to a chain on the topic of dealing with our parents:


OK, here's my new news.

My parents are nervous about a road trip.

My mom was more comfortable with us going to Hawaii and both were more comfortable with a beach house. HOWEVER they are not willing to fund anything.

So I'm just sitting there going, "So what the hell am I supposed to do?"

Also they expect me to go on a FAMILY vacation with them. I know it's very crazy and alien-esque to some of you, but I enjoy (used to) family vacations. Though recently, with new developments as of this year and the past, I don't really anymore.

My mom insists on some sort of schedule. She wants me to get a internship, work, etc etc. Get experience blah blah blah. She does trust us though not to wind up like that girl in Aruba. She knows we aren't going to wind up raped or pregnant or drugged or something parent-nightmarish if we went off on our own.

But I don't know where that leaves me. I don't know how I'm going to do anything without money. And how to break it to my parents that I really want a summer to have adventures without them.

I am going to miss my family, but I kinda need space to miss them right?

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I sound like a bitch, I know.

On the contrary, I love my family. I am close and closer than most people of my age. But I am getting tense. Things are tense and terrible, simmering below the surface. I'm growing out of my skin at home. I can't stay here. I'm need to leave.

My parents just aren't ready to see me go. I know I'm not ready for the world and I will probably burn. I will burn bad. I don't want to, but I need to you know? Sometimes you just need to fail in order to get up and try again and succeed. Or else, how do you? Nobody will hold your hand forever.